visions float before my eyes. I don't know where they came from, how they came to be but they're there. plain as day, or ratherp lain as whisps of smoke before they dissipate. I am my own worst enemy, I haunt my own dreams and change my own mind. I am woman. I am dirt. I am everything and nothing all at once. sometimes I can't cope. most times I can at least pretend. I live vicariously...through the lives of people that don't exist. fly me away. make me dream. let e step out of the dream ino something rea. something tangible. something not so transient. everything vchange, the only thing that as constant is that nothing is in fact constant. i want to stop time so just wait and let everything be still. and silent. I feel like a little glass sphere, flying through space. something we as spehere bounce together. what these little touches do depends on the strenght of the glass. sometimes they bounce off, nothing doing. other time they crack. one more little bump and the sphere will shatter. where am i travelling, who will I coolide with next? why are we even here... it's a cosmic game of marbles and we don't know who is controlling the big marble. who pushes us around. is it in fact nothing but a figment of the imagination. do we create a god only to let it destroy itself? we make and make and when we're done making we don't love what we've made. we finsd nothing but faults in the thing that is a part of us and yet separate, a thing that holds part of our very soul and essence in it's hands and we can do nothing but hate it for what it has taken from us. for what it is. we want to control but can we control?
wow, first time I've tried this. dunno what half this gibberish is supposed to mean but now I am le tired.